Chapter 4 of I AM THAT GIRL by Alexis Jones is “Be Unpopular.” At first when I read this title, I thought “Whaaaat!? What sort of odd message is that? What does that even mean?” I decided I needed to read this chapter because of my curiosity (and also because once I start reading a book, I have to finish it). The chapter is all about not worrying about what other people think or stressing over if or how to be cool, but instead focuses on why and how you should be authentic. We should all want to be ourselves, not some version of ourselves that’s molded by the opinions of other people in our lives. When you are your true self, you can more fully enjoy your happy and healthy adventure. 🙂 ❤
Here are my “highlighted” quotes of the chapter:
“But all too often popularity trumps authenticity and we allow our “people pleasing” to come at the expense of our personal goals and values. Whether it’s to your friends, family, colleagues, when you start looking outside yourself to make decisions, you’ve lost a sense of who you really are and what you stand for” (109).
“We need a shoulder to cry on when we are sad, encouragement when we are down, accountability when we stray, strength when we are weak, a calming voice when we are angry, and grounding when we’re too proud” (111).
“Have the courage to be unpopular. Be the one to have the guts to disagree and the confidence to stand up agains the mob of yes girls and say ‘no'”(112).
“Will you be dedicated to the path that gets you where you want to go, despite it being far more difficult, or will you sell out to an easy breezy path that takes you in the opposite direction of where you really want to go?” (114).
“…just deciding to eat well and get in better shape; every choice you make comes with consequences and sacrifices. And sometimes those sacrifices will make you stand out in a way that makes you uncomfortable and awkward, but they are always worth it” (119).
“…hold on tightly to the friends and family who support you especially when you’re younger and figuring out who you really want to be” (120).
“While we may hope that we are tough or independent enough to make our own opportunities, the truth is, the help of a strong support system can mean the difference between success and failure” (120).
“We are all gifted with some kind of adversity. I call it a gift because without a challenge there is nothing to overcome, and only in that space can we grow and see what we are really made of” (121).
“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people” (Eleanor Roosevelt, 126).
“I realized life is a gift. It’s not a guarantee, and it’s too short to fill it up with superficial, empty moments that look dull and depressing on your life’s canvas. Make it beautiful. Make it bright. Make it count” (Josie Loren, 129).
“Having the reputation that you’re the real deal makes you unimaginably influential because people believe in your abilities, they trust you to do what you say you’re going to, and are willing to support you along the way” (130).
“…being yourself is all you can do in life. There is no other option. Every other option makes you feel uncomfortable in your own skin, confused, empty, and that is no way to live” (Remi Nicole, 133).
“Grant each other permission to be who you are. Be gentle with yourself and the people around you. Protect your reputation and refuse to compromise your values. Listen to the advice of your closest circle of advisors, but not if that takes you down a path your heart knows is the wrong one. And above all, trust yourself enough to follow your own lead and go where you heart wants to take you” (134).